January 16, 2009

So Bank of America gets drunk one night, goes to a bar, picks up Angelo Mozilo and Countrywide. Wakes up the next morning, realizes they have AIDS.


Then runs down to the government clinic and takes us for $138 billion.

Thank you Angelo Mozilo.

Thank you Ken Lewis.

You f*cked America. You f*cked each other. You f*cked the taxpayer. All while you enriched yourselves beyond your wildest dreams.

Someone arrest these scoundrels. Before they go out and do it again.


31 comments:

Anonymous said...

Wow. These country wide books are cooked.
Jeeze Let's call Hank again. I wish these guys could by MCi worldcom back from the Verizon.

Oops we bought a dog that can't bark.....

Pulled another Paulson said...

You would have to be a numb nuts if you cannot see that the Govt. not only approved BOA's merger with Country fried but set it up with the promise that they will get the printing press running hot & keep them flush with cash...no matter how bad it gets. Countrywide was going down due to the massive corruption and either someone was going to take a fall like old Bernie is now or they would merge and hide it like they did. *Shame*

Free Market my Bung...Corruption & manipulation is closer to the truth.

Wind Farmer said...

NOT A HIJACKING, A CRASH LANDING

I believe that USAirways flight 1549 presents the perfect anology for our USEconomy. Here's what we need or we're going to crash and burn with few, if any survivors:

1. An experienced pilot with a lifetime of experience and a strong background in flight safty.

2. A pilot and crew who can act quickly and who understand that a risky landing is a much better choice than trying to keep a jet in the air that has 2 blown engines...Also a pilot and crew who, in an emergency, clearly understand that trying to make it to another airport (as they are quickly losing altitude) is not only foolhardy but impossible. Also, returning to the original airport is simply out of the question.

3. A crew capable of working together with one goal in a crisis: survival

4. Passengers who stay calm and don't kill each other as they try to escape/survive.

5. Emergency personal who are well-trained, quick to the scene and make sure everyone is safe and warm.

I think at this point we have to ditch this plane in the water...gliding in if we can. Then we can take care of the survivors. It is the only sensible course of action. Clearly there are capable people out there, heros actually, who can safely get us back on the ground and out of the water (if need be).
We just have to start listening to them.

Anonymous said...

This is getting out of hand .Who ever said that the objective of a Society was to keep the the Bad Banks and Wall Street Firms alive .
All this money goes to the bad loan losses of the scums . Not only did these firms breach their duty to underwrite loans that caused a massive crash ,they want us to pay for it . The public is objecting and
the Politicians ignore it .

Anonymous said...

RIP BOA.

Anonymous said...

Thomas Jefferson warned us (never learned that in school) about banks and their threat to this country. It would be nice if the Education system would teach history so we could learn something instead of just an exercise in trivia. The Banksters own it all and many people are winding up homeless (some should never have bought a home to begin with).

Roccman said...

why are we doing this?

oh that's right...

for cheap sex...

ok

Anonymous said...

Hehehe.. That's a great analogy, Keith. The only thing I'd add is that the subprime AIDS they picked up was created by the government (just like the real world AIDS was created by the US military as part of it's eugenics program in Africa).

Mark in San Diego said...

Classic analogy!. . .I guess Merril Lynch was VD??. . .go to the government clinic for a cure!. . .what next??? SootandAshes needs a government bailout too. . .head to Washington Keith.

Anonymous said...

You forgot to add " and had unprotected anal intercourse followed by oral copulation, numerous times until the yellow glow on Countrywide turned white".

Lewis could reasonably be ranked with George Bushco on the absolute dumb asshole meter...

Dip Lewis in grease and throw him and his entire board to the Lions. If anything is left feed it though a wood chipper.

America is DEAD thanks to punks like this.

a mean and greedy sob said...

Here's some good reading to focus on when not marveling over what putzes Edgar and Mammoth are.

http://tinyurl.com/8s7mpe

Anonymous said...

I'd like to get in the cargo hold of that jet in the Hudson River. Maybe what really brought that plane down was excess weight - billions of freshly minted dollars headed for B of A in Charlotte.

broke and angry said...

It is just disgusting.They must of got huge bonuses this year with all the free money from the govt.

Ron Paul is right! said...

They are shocked at what they got? They didn't know Countrywide's paper was crap?PUHLEEEZE! Come on man, you know better than that. They gambled that the government would be able to prop up home prices and they'd cleanup on the houses and they LOST. So let 'em lose. We don't need B of A, always thought they sucked anyway. The real problem, the thing you should be griping about is the government handout B of A is recieving.

LET 'EM FAIL, LET 'EM ALL FAIL. LET CAPITALISM WORK WITH NO GOVERNMENT INTERVENTION. But no, more bandaids instead of actual surgery. And your good buddy Obama is getting ready to break out the super duper deluxe size first aid kit. This country is doomed.

I am officially in "fuck everybody except family" mode. I am giving money to family who needs, armed to the teeth and when the shit hits the fan (its no longer a case of if), I will be ready.

Paige Turner said...

Please consider Another Shotgun Marriage: Bank of America and Merrill Lynch.

"Bank of America (BAC) agreed to pay $44 billion for a company that would have been worth $18 billion on Monday's open, assuming a $5 markdown on Monday to $12. Why?"

"I sense a shotgun wedding sponsored at gunpoint by the Fed. A shotgun wedding at a purposely ridiculous price with an agreement from the Fed to pick up the pieces later if necessary sounds just like what the doctor ordered. Of course it could be pure incompetence by Lewis, or a pure gamble by Lewis that the Fed (taxpayers) would pick up the pieces if it all came crashing down."

"One point to remember is that the Fed is desperate to buy time. The Fed seems willing to lie, threaten, postpone, and usurp authority to buy that time. Time is up for this maneuver."

P.T.

Lost Cause said...

I thought that you were making a joke, Keith. "An orange man walks into a bar...Is that a Countrywide, or are you just glad to see me?"

Americano said...

Al-Queefer

How come no mention of the Europan banks?

There all falling apart or being nationalized.

Are you being fed a strict diet of the BBC and AlJazeera?

some of todays other headlines:

http://tinyurl.com/a32ark

http://tinyurl.com/7pc4xo

http://tinyurl.com/8prbxy

The 'Swiss bank' thing is over for ever.

Anonymous said...

"So Bank of America gets drunk one night, goes to a bar, picks up Angelo Mozilo and Countrywide. Wakes up the next morning, realizes they have AIDS."

picking up someone at a bar and getting aids implies some type of innocence.

ken lewis and BofA knew angelo mozilla had aids.

Anonymous said...

shoulda called it jail, as the buy up of merril of a bunch of brokers for 50 billion? when they might be just the theives who sold bogus crap over and over again and been easily trplaced by homeless street bumsa and tayght to not do business that way

Anonymous said...

Mo money mo money...

Film, Porn Shoots Sought by Los Angeles Homeowners Hit by Slump

Jan. 16 (Bloomberg) -- Jayshree Gupta reclined on an English-style sofa in her Beverly Hills penthouse as crews buzzed around taping protective paper over the hardwood floors and wheeling in crates of camera gear.

She was hosting a television-commercial shoot. It meant allowing dozens of strangers and 400-pound klieg lights into her home for a full day, and it was worth every minute, Gupta said.

“I am doing it because I need money to maintain my lifestyle,” she said, perched near a portrait of herself painted by her friend Barbara Carrera, the Bond girl in 1983’s “Never Say Never Again.” “A lot of my money is either gone or tied up. Right now I am hurting.”

Gupta, a clothing and jewelry designer, is among an increasing number of recession-pinched Los Angeles homeowners turning to Hollywood for help, offering their houses as sets for feature films, commercials and even adult movies.

The daily fee paid for the sort of work done at Gupta’s 3,000-square-foot condo in the city’s signature 90210 ZIP code is usually $2,000 to $3,000, Darrell said. That would cover about half of her monthly household bills, including maid service.


http://tinyurl.com/74exmp

keith said...

And Ken Lewis wasn't fired today why?

What a dumbass.

But not as dumb as BofA shareholders. Now THAT'S dumb.

k.w. - Southern Ca. said...

This corporate looting will continue until enough people have lost everything -- then people lose it, and will take matters into their own hands.

It doesn't have to come to that if the right things are done with tax-payer money, but it appears it's still business as usual up in Washington and withtin the financial sector.

The "too big to fail" are continually being bailed-out, while the "too small to care about" are going out-of-business or out on the streets.

Anonymous said...

Ha! Gotta love the ultraliberals...now they want to use the same failed model all over the country. When you have Pelosi, Boxer, and Feinstein, that's what you get. Hey, but gay marriage is priority. Look look, a Hollywood celeb, throw your hard-earned money at it! Monkeys.

Millions may not get California tax refunds on time

SACRAMENTO—In just a few weeks, California is expected to begin issuing state refunds to more than 10 million taxpayers—a welcome injection of cash into the ailing economy.

There's just one catch: The state may delay the checks or issue IOUs instead.

California, the most populous state in the nation, is running out of cash with a $41.6 billion deficit that Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger and lawmakers have thus far been unable to resolve despite more than two months of negotiations.

The situation is so dire that the state controller has warned he will have to delay payments to taxpayers, businesses, social service programs and student aid to conserve money in the state's checking account. Finance officials project the state will run out of cash in late February


http://tinyurl.com/9jkodj

I've gotten a brilliant idea, why don't you ultraliberal geniuses pump another 20 million illiterate Mexicans into your Californian cities, so they can breed like flies into another 90 million. Bill Maher and Arianna Huffington would love that, as long as they don't move next to their Beverly Hills mansions. Baahhhhhh

Californians are rich and soooo hip!

Anonymous said...

This is getting out of hand .Who ever said that the objective of a Society was to keep the the Bad Banks and Wall Street Firms alive .
All this money goes to the bad loan losses of the scums . Not only did these firms breach their duty to underwrite loans that caused a massive crash ,they want us to pay for it . The public is objecting and
the Politicians ignore it .


The Politicians aren't ignoring the public. They were bought and paid for by the banks, and are doing exactly what they are told. This is what Jefferson warned against and it is happening because our education system turns out idiots. MBAs and Phds that are stupid as shit and will be fleeced like the good little sheeple they are.

Anonymous said...

> This is what Jefferson warned against

A. Jackson spent a good deal of time warning about this also.

screech said...

Did the tan man get a dirty sanchez from lewis?

Anonymous said...

"So Bank of America gets drunk one night, goes to a bar, picks up Angelo Mozilo and Countrywide. Wakes up the next morning, realizes they have AIDS."

So does that mean that Barney was there too? Why can I not think of anything nice about the most repulsive human on earth?

Ross said...

From my perspective as a former Countrywide employee:
Countrywide is like that girl that's waiting around after 2 a.m. for a guy, any guy to look her way. She's a little over-weight and everyone's had a go with her, but there's always a new victim every time.
Apparently, Ken Lewis was the biggest victim, because not only did he knock boots, but he actually slipped one past the goalie. OOPS!!
Now he's trying to say he had no idea what happened. It was a complete surprise, etc etc etc. Meanwhile, they're about to give birth to something just horrific and he's got spots all over his "Lewis."
To make it worse Countrywide has turned cunt-trywide on him and he's about ready to tear his hair out.
He's definitely going to get his merger tubes tied up real soon, so that this doesn't happen again. Too bad it's already too late. I used to like BofA

Anonymous said...

This is the reason why the government has no business in providing healthcare.

Anonymous said...

"...Gotta love the ultraliberals..."

Not as much as the rubes successfully distracted by the partisan sideshow; they're the real hoot.

Anonymous said...

the powers that be, told bank of america to purchase countrywide and other toxic entities knowing they we no good. it was do this now, and we will take care of you later.